the view from my sink

so, i have buttloads to do still. tomorrow, we go back and pack up a fourteen foot uhaul and clean the house. ugh!

but, can i just say that my heart is so light here? i love this house. it seems this blog always finds me waiting for light, but i am waiting for light so i can take pantry photos. the other ones turned out fuzzy, but in the meantime this is the view from my kitchen sink. not 'my sink that used to be ours', but my old deep porcelain sink.

i can not explain the intensity of the cleaving to this new old home, the discovery of why that hook was there or the covered up rock garden bed and the questions of what was originally there. living in my beloved old house was bittersweet. i loved it and still do. it is magical and has ambience coming out its wazoo, but i didn't realize how abandoned i felt there until i woke up here.

that house helped me keep my head above water while i maintained the semblance of home for my children, our animals and myself, but i really didn't realize the depth of how left behind that i felt there. God is a God of many sutures and painrelief and maybe He had to hide that from me until i arrived here.