those ers

just take me as i am,
or have nothing at all.
-mary j blige

i want to look at life just as lucy mae looks at me. she doesn't apologize for stealing panties, chewing pens, raiding the catlitter box, eating more than her share, slopping at the waterbowl, chewing anything on the floor, pushing her way through the door, wrestling the cats and the other dogs or for being a pure brat. she simply lives life like there is no tomorrow.

this week, i was thinking about how my selfdefinitions have drastically & instantly changed in the past seven months and how some new definitions are filing in like little toy soldiers in their place. seven months ago, i would have not been ready for it...and now, i say 'bring it!'

i am no longer defined by the years i was faithfully married, the burdens carried or the love that was buried. what defines me is that i am and forever will be a Godtruster, mother of three, thingcreator, imagemaker, creaturecaregiver, encourager, laugher, musiclover, filmwatcher, hopemaker, puddlejumper, photographer, provider, lipglosshoarder, baker, treehugger, dartthrower, believerinhardwork, thoughtgatherer, friendforeverer, cheerleader, toiletbowlcleaner, outsideoftheboxer, incenseburner, networker, haikuwriter, listmaker, girlpowerspreader, coffeemaker, hoopjumper, rememberer, bedmaker, lifelover, foodcooker, bookreader, gardener, recycler, clotheswasher, treasurehunter, needleworker, nurturer, yougogirler, thrifter, crafter, blogwriter, smiler, smilemaker, sister, artmaker, youcandoiter, candlelighter, bootyshaker, and thinker(ofperhapstoomuch)...but like lucy, i want to look at life like it is my next snack and love it as much as it loves me.

live like lucy.